Why Did I Get Married?

I had a chance to see Tyler Perry’s movie “Why Did I Get Married?”, and enjoyed it immensely. It is the depiction of four couples with various marital issues and “secrets” that customarily meet annually for a romantic retreat in the mountains. My favorite portrayal is the role of singer Jill Scott, who plays a full-figured woman, with low self-esteem, who is misused and abused by her husband because of her obesity. This movie validates that I am on target with the writing and release of my new book, “Know Your Worth! (Overcoming the Dragon of Low Self-Esteem).”

In the opening scene of the movie, Sheila (Jill Scott), her husband Mike (Richard T. Jones), and his lover Trina (Denise Boutte) are boarding an airplane to meet the other three couples for their mountain vacation. Incidentally, Trina (the lover) was suppose to be a trusted friend of Sheila’s, who had no idea of her friend’s betrayal and infidelity with her husband. A flight attendant (at the annoyance of one of the passengers), asked Sheila to pay for an additional seat because she was too large to fit in the “normal” one. Her husband laughed and spat out insulting “fat” jokes and eventually instructed her to drive; which she did.

Throughout the movie, scenes reflected back to a frazzled Sheila as she tried to navigate the car up the mountains on snow-covered roads, in the throws on an oncoming snow blizzard. Sheila is on a mission to “save” her troubled marriage – at all cost. She finally arrives at the resort. However, instead of saving her marriage, she is confronted with the facts (through an outburst from a loud-mouth friend) that her husband is having an affair, which he follows up by stating his intention of leaving her.

After the movie, I had a discussion with a friend of mine who stated that she felt the movie was too fictional because no one would put up with such behavior in “real” life. I quickly informed her that I know (all to well) of such cases of abuse and even greater. This is truly real, and I applaud Tyler Perry for bringing it to the big screen.

In my book, “The Art of Forgiving, I tell of a couple in my hometown in Texas, who constantly had public bouts of domestic violence. On one occasion, the husband lit a match and strategically placed it in his wife’s nose. The next day, this couple was spotted smiling and walking hand-in-hand as if this incident had not occurred. One would wonder, what type of explanation could have been offered to justify such repulsiveness to make her stay in a marriage, knowing that the cycle of abuse would continue. My guess would be low self-esteem issues coupled with fear of change. I had them and I am sure some of you can witness to some fears of your own!

I am so glad that the movie ended on a high note. Sheila, took some time to “find her true identity” and eventually found her “true love” in the form of a man so respectful, caring, and oh so fine – Sheriff Troy (Lamman Rucker) who resided and worked in the mountains. Tyler’s message sends forth a glimmer of hope that there is a possibility of discovering and rekindling love again, with the right person, in the golden years (after 40) of your life. An associate of mine once said, “I am not looking for the perfect woman, but I am looking for a woman who’s perfect for me”! You should definitely see the movie and add it to your DVD collection.

Vickie is a gifted and talented author, playwright, poet, producer, newsletter editor, and musical director. Her artistic career spans over three decades. She started her own a talent production agency entitled Soaring High Production, which assist performing artists, playwrights, poets, and authors to “soar to their destiny” by providing a forum for them to display their talents. She produced her first professional stage play entitled “A Change Is Gonna Come”, that depicts domestic violence in the church.

Her first book, “The Art of Forgiving” is an empowerment memoir that discloses how she gained freedom from the ills of divorce by mastering the “art” of forgiving.

Her second book, “Know Thy Worth! (Overcoming the Dragon of Low Self-Esteem)”, is scheduled for release in March 2008. This book encourages ladies to find their uniqueness to be released from the need for conformity. “For many years I suffered from a self-imposed identity crisis; trying to please others who were not deserving of my attention!” For more information, visit her website at http://www.forgiven2.com

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